Life can be tough, don’t let it beat you

        I stood by my mom’s bed and reached my hand over and placed it on a baseball-size lump on her head.
       It was late September 2009 and I knew time was short for my mom. Cancer had taken over her body and the diagnosis wasn’t looking good.
       It had been 12 years earlier in August 1997 when doctors first found cancer in one of her breasts. Mom opted to have it removed.
        At the time, my mom chose not to have chemo administered after the surgery. She recalled an uncle and aunt in Tulsa who both died in their 60s a few years apart, and both had cancer.
        They sought the best treatment possible and the cancer won.
        My mom always said, “What the cancer didn’t do, the chemo will finish it off.”
       In the years that followed, Mom would give me a call and update me on her cancer diagnosis following each checkup.
      It wasn’t until 2008 that the cancer started moving again. She’d developed gallstones and was in the hospital in Tulsa at the start of the year.
       I wasn’t until February of that year that doctors tried blasting the gallstones and that didn’t work. I believe doctors tried a second time and it worked.
       It was shortly after the gallstone episode that the cancer started spreading again. It quickly moved into her liver and then her bones. She underwent cyber knife surgery in November 2008 in Tulsa. The surgery is a non-invasive radiation treatment called stereotactic radiosurgery that uses a robotic arm to target cancerous tumors.
        The cancer quickly moved into her brain, thus the lump on her head.
       My folks didn’t let the cancer stop them. Mom, dad and my sister-in-law made the trek from Tulsa to Iowa and spent Thanksgiving that year with Debbie and me. My brother wasn’t able to come as he was hauling fright in an 18-wheeler.
       Family on Debbie’s side came and we had a great celebration. My folks went shopping and bought some new pants, a shirt and some shoes for my dad at the outlet mall in Williamsburg.
       In June 2009, we took Mom to Cancer Treatment Centers in Tulsa. They ran a few tests and said they might be able to help. She agreed to a couple rounds of low dose chemo. It’s didn’t help.
       My mom died on Sept. 27, 2009, one day after my 50th birthday. I’m thankful that she hung on that one extra day for me.
        I was not in Tulsa when she died, but had been there about a week earlier.
      I knew when I left that I wouldn’t see her alive again. That was the toughest part, but I needed to go home. I had been in Tulsa for a week. She was receiving the best care possible from my family and hospice.
      I had earlier written my mom a letter and thanked her for raising me right, taking me to church and teaching me the Good book.
       She was a hard worker and loved her family. She could be stubborn, but she always stood her ground and fought the good fight for what she believed in.
        It’s never easy to lose a parent, especially at 72-years of age.
      My dad died nine months later on July 10, 2010, mostly of a broken heart. He had had some issues with cancer, Dementia and Alzheimer’s as well.
       I made a trek to Oklahoma in the spring of 2010 to see my dad and start the process of cleaning out 52 plus years of life packed in every nook and cranny there was.
       My brother woke my dad up and he saw me and said, “It’s good to see you, son. I got a lot of stuff I want to do around here, but I need to take a nap.”
       He was moved to a hospice house in Tulsa on June 9 that year.
      I was in the room the next evening when he passed and I watched as Jesus himself came down and took him to heaven. That was a peaceful and an awe-inspiring experience.
      I wanted to share this story as I know there are people out there who are fighting battles with no end in sight. I’ve heard the stories and I’ve heard the good reports and the victories.
      Our youngest nephew had cancer two years ago and he is cancer free to this day. I was diagnosed with cancer in March 2025 and I’m cancer free to this day, too.
      Those who see this story, don’t be disheartened. Don’t give up. Keep fighting, keep praying, keep getting up every day and doing good for others.
      If something in your body doesn’t seem right, see your doctor or visit a specialist. Don’t wait until it’s too late.
       In my case, I was suffering from some severe stomach pains and at the urging of Debbie, decided to see a specialist. I’m so glad I did.
      My cancer was found early and it hadn’t broken through the wall of my colon. I had a great surgeon who took good care of me.
       I read a story some years ago about a woman in Houston, Texas who got cancer. Every day she got up, got dressed and went out and prayed for others who were sick. She was healed by faith and lived at least another 30 plus years.
       There is hope!
      Always remember that Good Things are Happening, every day and always.